A Confession

I always feel like there is an elephant in the room when I start to talk about youth ministry. I can organize a lock-in, plan a mission trip, pull off breakfast for 200. Those things, I know.

I do not know that much about the Bible.

Maybe that doesn't sound like a big deal, but when you consider that I am a Senior High Youth Director for a church, suddenly it seems to matter.

I know the basics. I can outline the whos and the wheres and produce a general time line. I can rap all the books of the Old and New Testament, in order. It is a great party trick. (Thank you James Ward!) I can recite a handful of verses.

What I can't do is offer comfort or solace or evidence or encouragement through biblical truths and references. I can't listen to a reading and interpret it so as to apply it to my life. If you asked me, I wouldn't have a favorite Bible verse, simply because I don't know enough of them to make a judgment.

This has never bothered me before.

I was raised in the church and I attended Sunday school most weeks September-May. I wasn't a C&E Christian, I was a school year Christian. I remember being so surprised when I was in junior high and I realized that people could go to church year round. That never even occurred to me. After a mediocre confirmation experience and the typical ups and downs of a high school youth group, I dropped away from church in college and stayed away for a variety of reasons until my daughter was born. Gradually my husband and I found ourselves back at church and enjoying the connection we found there. Eventually, through a series of events that will someday be its own post, we joined the staff as the Youth Directors.

What we brought to the position was a passion for high school students, his teaching background and my ability to organize. What we lacked was any clue as to how to actually run a youth program.

We learned fast. We are still learning. Thank God for His grace, generously doled out to us, as we muddled through that first year.

My husband has what I don't: a solid background in biblical study, in part because of his parochial school upbringing and also because of his strong confirmation experience. Between the two of us, his strengths were my weaknesses and vice versa.

But that isn't enough anymore. Maybe no one else has noticed, but I have. And I crave the knowledge that's waiting for me as I start to dig into the Word. I don't want to be one of those "sound bite" youth directors...I want to help the youth and other people in my life find meaning in the Bible.

How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time. It is a big job.